Friday, October 26, 2012

I Am Thirsty

I am not an early riser. In fact, there are very few reasons that can make me rise early. And now that I retrospect, most of the reasons are very personal. I wake up early because I have to catch an early morning flight for a holiday or I get up early because I am running loosies… so on and so forth!! The only challenge with me of getting up early is from the moment I wake up, I feel something is not right. Funny part is, most of the times, I am right!

This time, ofcourse, it was a genuine holiday I had picked. After 2 years of wait and missing being there, I was going to be in Lucknow for Durga Puja. Sleep was optional. But I did sleep well, fantasizing… eerrr… dreaming of days (and nights) ahead.

Reaching the airport was easy and smooth. This time, the cab guy was on time. I left on time and reached the airport well before time to avoid the extra security during festival time. To my surprise and not a pleasant one, most travelers thought exactly the same. All queues had taken the shape of Q. Added to that the multiplicity of agonies - entry to the airport had a south Indian guy who could ask the right question in Hindi, the usher assisting passengers to the right check-in queue responded only in English, not realizing the aunty in the saree and gajra is only nodding but not moving an inch. Then, there are “smart” travelers who will keep jumping queues before the usher has finished her/his instruction and mess up big time. I checked in and got through security, just in time when it was the last and final call. For the first time to catch a flight, and in a long time I actually ran! I jogged up quickly to the doors to get onto the bus to take me to the aircraft. On the bus, it struck me – holy crap, today was the day I had the chance to have my name announced in full blast on a public announcement system!! I missed the chance of a life time. (Not knowing then, life gives you a second chance, in quick succession, sometimes!! More on that later)

Once on the flight, I figured, I was the last passenger to board but the flight isn’t taking off. I picked the prettiest hostess, waited for her to cross the aisle and enquired, with my huffing still on after the run. She smiled and my heart said, “now that’s what is called a Good Morning!!”. The moment she informed, “we are waiting for some passengers to arrive through a connecting flight from Dubai to Lucknow, I suddenly said “ohhh, Sheikh that booty”! She smiled again, but for the last time, never ever looking at me for the whole flight.

I tried my best to apologize, though. The most genuine excuse to catch her attention was my early morning cup of tea. The next time she passed by, I again enquired, “can I have tea?” She apologized curtly, and said they are not serving tea. I asked, “coffee”? She again apologized and said “we are not serving hot beverages today morning”. Alas, my slippery mouth and dirty mind. I controlled but just muttered off, “serving hot for sure”. I think this was enough for her to “Sheikh her booty” hard and shoo off never to make eye contact any more. I too lost interest in her and moved on. 

So, I called for next best looking hostess. And simply ordered for water. Yes, this time I didn’t say a word extra. I just said, “I am thirsty”.


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