Sunday, December 07, 2014

I am Alive

What I cannot share, I hide
What I cannot hide, spreads rumours
With every thought, time flies
To clouds of suspicious memories
Words tossed up, hurled into the sky
Striking at the stars and making them fall
With wavering startles and dimness.
This is how thoughts come to me
Flashes of memories, dry hot blows of pain
With sudden numbness in between

To let me know I am alive.

Silent Valley

Sitting with stars as company
I count stars, all alone.
Standing alone on the cliff
Clouds murmur greetings of you.
The chill in the air
The mist and its moistness
The light breeze with heavy notes
Share with me your presence.
We are far and yet to close
Like the valley below and hanging clouds
Saving it from the sun, and yet
Drenching possessively, the one they love.
As the night passes
The moon smiles, blushing
Another night slides away in silence

Without telling anyone about us.

Pie in the circle of Life

We know what’s sufficient,
For us to live at ease.
What we don’t realise is;
When is it enough?
Width of our needs,
Breadth of wants,
Depth of greed,
Buries our content.
In the circle of life,
On the diameter of desires,
We run across to edges;
Slipping to temptations, sometimes.
On thin lines of radius,
Through bored, blunt pencils,
Overwritten, the unrequited;
Is an expensive but required;
Urge to forego.


Why don’t you linger around
In my thoughts
For a bit more time
My restless mind
Needs a new reason
To unhide itself.
My heart aches
To show its scars
To be touched by a light
And show me the tunnel
For my pain to walk out
Hand in Hand
Where the lines of destiny
Which end on my palm
Are crossed over by yours
Entangling our mismatch
And completes our existence

Together & forever

Game of Love

With thoughts playing in my head,
And words being said without much thought;
It never seemed like a game I knew.

With rules vanishing away,
Much like my fellow players;
It turned out everyone was an opponent.

Emotions seeped out of it,
And so I loved with all my heart;
To be proven wrong yet again.

My soul had its own battles to fight,
And it chose me to settle its dues;
Soul was to love & be loved.

Think what you can; do what you must.
Never have a plan;
To love or lust.


There are people who say they know you well
There are days when you are not you
Everyone is around
But no one misses you.
There are nights when it is bright & striking
Stars shine & the moon gleams
You want to be felt
But no breeze to touch you.
There are times when you are not happy
You are not sad either; just don’t feel right
That one thought passes by

And there is content.


I want to bask in today’s sun
Rather than slipping away
Into shadows of yesterday
I want to walk alone
But alongside stars & the moon
Wait for sunrise
And welcome tomorrow.
Or it will be today, right?

I want to feel myself smiling
And enjoy my solitude
I want to touch my being
And hear the silence within
I trust my intuitions
I dream my imaginations
I am in no hurry to be there

But I should not miss the sunrise, either.

My need to want You

I need you to know my faults
But I want you to ignore them for a while
I need you to know I can do better
but I want you to make me so.

I have to tell you so much about me
And yet I have things you better not know
I want though, to know, all of you
And I need to surrender all me to you.

I want you to win this fight within me
Of my need to want you
And my want of having you
Only for myself
I want to lose myself
To win you over.

Pieces of Love

Sometimes it is better to break
And become pieces
Instead of remaining intact
Those tiny, invisible shards
Can spread carelessly
And when the sun shines
Throw rays to all directions
Declaring the love I have for you
To the entire world
I have decided, hence
To celebrate this soreness
This strike of destiny
To keep us apart

Probably never to meet, ever.

Veiled desires

Open eyes
Veiled desires
Quivering lips
Unsaid agreements
Whispering breaths
Screaming passion
A timid tease
A torrid temptation

Seducing moves
Fire up quests
For eyes to flirt
Fingers to touch
Hands to explore
Lips to devour
Bodies to savour
Souls to meet

Despite defences
There is a moment
When barriers break
Controls fail
You lose senses
You win the other


Your eyes,
Innocent and quiet;
Shining but shy, twinkling elegance.
They talk incessantly, leaving me speechless
Moving softly to leave me paralysed 
A look from you,
Shares something I can’t own;
But the desire to possess,
Translate into dreams.
That delicate gaze
Strips me off my fa├žade
I become what I could be
I bare my soul
And search for yours.
I am scared of them too, sometimes.
They seek too much.
They take too much.
They kill me, almost.
By making me breathless.
But they give me so much too.
They give me hope.
They give me love.
They give me desire.
They give me the message;

I can be me, with you.

Saturday, December 06, 2014

Hide and Seek

Like a wanderer, I travel through the day.
With an unknown living, getting to know life.
I rest at nights, watching the stars.
Playing hide and seek; celebrating darkness.
I wake up to the sun. Get relief in shadows.
When breeze passes by, perspiration cools me down.

I am a wanderer. I know not of any destination.
Roads lead me ahead, turns disappear behind me.
The leafless tree stands tall; perhaps that’s a milestone
A landmark for travellers, to find their way back.
There was a well too. Did hear it never dries.
It knows there will be days,
When thirst gulps emotion and hunger swallows aspiration.

My eyes keeps walking, my steps follow.
My heart sings, I hum along.
My fingers point at the horizon;
My mind picks directions.
I never know what lies ahead;
I know I will reach a place that I have never been.
I know I will have a view I have never seen.
I will walk on days.
I will rest at nights.
At dusk, I will prepare for the next game
Of hide and seek.

Are we there yet?

I suddenly feel depressed.
You feel happiness all around;
In just a moment.
But, there has to be a reason,
To get that lump in my throat.
Or have moist eyes.
To feel agony or intimate
To feel lost or purposely lose.
Feel sheer joy or blue.
Alas, I get so busy with the feeling
Of sadness or celebration!
Arguing to convince why I am right, always;
I don’t remember why all this started? And when I do,
I don’t know how to step it up or step back?
I forget why all exists, at all.

We need to understand, that
All want to be happy.
And all we want is someone;
Who needs us.

To be at the place,
Where you and I can breathe;.
We don’t need words
We just need sense.
To touch and embrace.
To see and know.
To taste and serve.
To listen and nod.
To say and not hurt.

Are we there yet?

Folds on your forehead

Your smile would make me alive;
Smoothen the creases of my worries.
Deep and dark crevices of my being;
Would open up for you by just your being with me.
You could reach where no one else had,
You would touch me where I never existed, yet.
Your voice would warm my heart in cold nights
Your touch would heal my ruining self.
With intervals of time rivers dry up.
Leaves fall off in summers even on windless days.
It is nature of life to blossom and wear off in seasons.
You and I fell into one such trap and departed.
I kept flowing like a dry rivulet waiting for monsoons;
You flew away to presence of a new season.
I have survived, living on memories;
Of bounty & over flowing streams of love.
Today, standing with you, looking at you;
Am unable to watch you this way.
Let me swim across these waves that line your forehead.
These folds which have suddenly swallowed you.
I see you. But I miss your face that is my need.


Opened my old almirah,
To find something misplaced.
Was not sure if I would find it there
Searching for a while, suddenly
Found a neatly folded paper,
Tucked under an old blanket.
Since my mind was playing hide-n-seek,
With that misplaced object, I ignored this paper.
Finally, I gave up and closed the almirah.
Walking back, I saw a crumpled paper on the table,
Which reminded me of that folded paper in the almirah.
I went back, opened the chest and took out that blanket.
And I was surprised when not one, but two paper pieces fell off the folds.

One was a multi-fold paper piece.
I could make out some impressions on one side.
Had something written inside which tempted me instantly,
To open and read it, when I noticed,
The other was a clean old yellowish single paper fold,
Which turned out to be an envelope,
That had no address.
I unfolded the written piece.
And was shocked by the hand writing,
It was mine!
A little unsure now, I opened the piece fully.
Read the whole letter in one single breath.
Without any feeling, I tore the paper length;
And I tore the envelope too.

I closed the almirah,
Crumpled the torn letter and envelope;
Picked the already crumpled paper on the table,
And threw all of it together in the bin.
I sat down on the table and reminisced.
Those moments, days and nights.
I smiled and unknowingly shook my head,
With no address, how could I post the letter?
But with no address, why did I have an envelope in hand?
And even though I had an envelope,

I never put the letter inside the envelope?


I see my world
I hear voices, known and unknown
I feel the naughty breeze
I touch innocent raindrops

I stand and view afar
But it is only when I am sitting
All alone & wondering in silence
Looking for nothing in particular
Is when I see another window
A new frame opens up
And another self is sitting across
Peeping into my being
And he makes me see a lost world
Makes me hear my voice
Gives me the feeling of stillness
Delusions of my past
And a happy future blinks

But then it is time
To return to reality
The sun blinds me within
The window becomes my cage
I close it to escape confinement
I run away from me!

You Choke Me

Looking at you,
My own existence chokes me.
I cannot breathe, anymore. 
I desire you, like a roaring river
In a wild, stormy night,
Rushing to meet its end.
Unwrap­ping myself,
To be closer.
To get to you, to be in you.
Your presence is my ocean;
Embracing and taking me in.
Deeper, I need to go.
I slide and float,
Dive and settle.
Your touch are my waves.
Pushing me aside; pulling me within,
Rolling me slightly; brushing me roughly, sometimes.
Pinning me down, to nothing.
The melody of togetherness,
With fingers playing the music of love;
Without words.
But reverberating with intense meanings.
The foot bridge over the river,
Shaking and trembling,
Crossed, many a times,
Without looking at night or day;
Bodies ris­ing and heaving.
Sur­facing, glis­ten­ing, to finally drown
As there isn’t an inch that is left to hold

I am all in you and you in me.

Arrows of lust

Trickling down my skin;
Soothes the longing, sometimes.
But it does makes a restless rush
For your touch, gusty emotions
Wandering eyes, exploring fingers
Moving bodies, still needs
Heat of sensuous breaths
Crushing embraces, moist lips
Cold, dark desires
Darker intentions.

Arrows of lust.
Have just been shot.